Battles Inside Out

  What are you thinking? Why are we suddenly discussing a random psychological illness? Well, it isn’t too random anymore, not to me. I was misdiagnosed and it broke me A lot is at stake when it comes to mental illnesses being diagnosed accurately. My first psychiatrist diagnosed me with anxiety disorder. The prescription had nothing else written on it, except for the two pills to be taken at night alongside a lone “Anxiety Disorder” hanging from the top. Not even the type of anxiety disorder I had. It didn’t matter then, I was truly glad to have gotten the sleeping pills. I slept well! Can you imagine?! I couldn't, really.  Now I know all of it only made me feel emotionally confused, vulnerable, and full of self pity. I was empty, heartbroken. A different kind of Durga Puja and my BPD diagnosis It was officially the first day of the festival and I had an appointment with my new psychiatrist. Ma’am, if you’re reading this, I honestly didn’t know what to expect. It might just b...

10th October is celebrated as World Mental Health Day, but the irony is mental illnesses are considered a burden in most countries, if not all. You will find the following stats on the official website of the World Health Organisation (WHO): “In terms of economic loss, mental health conditions are estimated to cause a wastage of USD 1.03 trillion between 2012-2030 (in India alone).” How does it make you feel? It makes me feel like an out of order train engine, seriously. Those who suffer from mental health conditions feel the most pressure to be of help in any way possible - to themselves, to other people, and to the world. It is very difficult to have anxiety and stay completely unproductive. You have to keep doing something until you completely exhaust yourself and can’t even think properly. Work is a distraction. It helps us stay sane. If you are depressed, you either feel so numb that work or no work makes no difference, or you constantly keep giving yourself guilt trips for wastin...

  Can you fall further into an abyss if you have already reached a dead end? Many of us think it’s impossible to go through more pain than what we have gone through already. But life is never out of tricks to bring out of its sleeve. If you didn’t know, September is suicide prevention month. But September is gone and that is not what we are here to talk about. We are here to discuss something that demands even more attention and a little more than people telling us, “snap out of it already!” There are many who feel suicide is something one does when they are too weak or too insensitive, that they are selfish, only caring about their own emotions and what they feel in that very moment. Ironically, it is just the opposite. Suicidal people are the most empathetic human beings you will ever get to know. There is a reason I say this with such confidence. They decide on giving up only when they feel like a burden to everyone else around them. They do not want other people to carry even a...